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Featured Local Event         full calendar»

Friday, February 10th - 7:00 PM-2:00 AM

Pavilion Fridays @ Mount Adams Pavilion
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DERF Happy Hour

Friday, Feb 24 - 5:30PM-9:30PM

Mt. Lookout Tavern (MLT's), $10 for 10 Beers -OR- 6 Cocktails!
lame horoscopes

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Depressing & Uninspiring. Every Wednesday.
Send to friends to ruin their day too.


Wednesday, August 18th

Aries
A clean living space will clear your mind. Ask your roommate at the Talbot House to join you in tidying up your bunks today.
Aries
Aries
You inspire people to think of the beach, because you smell of kelp and seagull droppings.
Aries
Taurus
Your computer is afflicted with a virus that puts a smiley face at the bottom of every email you send out. People find it extremely annoying.
Taurus
Virgo
Get out of the old breakfast routine. Have a bagel instead of malt liquor and see what that does to improve your day.
Virgo
Virgo
Gravy is not a beverage.
Virgo
Scorpio
Keep a close eye behind you at all times this week. In fact, stop reading this and turn around now.
Scorpio
Scorpio
You are becoming overwhelmed by guilt. Father, turn yourself in to the Archdiocese.
Scorpio
Sagittarius
Your dog is shedding at about three times the normal rate. This is a sign for you to collect all of the hair and make a pretend dog. Then save a lot of money by giving your real dog to a better family.
Sagittarius
Capricorn
Your lucky numbers this week are t, q, m, s, and h. Yep, you're lucky numbers are just as confused as you are.
Capricorn
Aquarius
Use a civil tone when addressing your enemies this week, but go ahead and scream at your parents for no reason. They deserve it for making you into the empty shell that you are.
Aquarius
Pisces
That last piece of fried chicken you had was extremely high in calories. The worse news is, it wasn't chicken. You should have noticed the flea collar.
Pisces
Pisces
You will be visited in your dreams by a mythical lion who will tell you the secret to eternal happiness. You will then be visited while awake by a real lion who will maul and eat you.
Pisces
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