Gorilla Glue production halted due to worldwide shortage of dead gorillas.
CINCINNATI - The Gorilla Glue company warned retailers this week to expect product shipping delays this holiday season due to limited availability of the productís key ingredient dead gorillas. The manufacturer located on Redbank Road explained the growing season for gorillas this year was stunted due to unfortunate rain forest weather shifts that impacted the gorilla food source. Gorilla harvesting is expected to increase next year allowing a return to profitability in businesses that depend on dead gorillas as the primary raw material.
- R.P. McMurphy's unveils 900 car parking garage
- Area church gives up religion for more profitable church festival business
- Parking lot Sno Castle empire efficiently converted to Christmas tree empire
- Touchdown Jesus casket only slightly larger than Gary Coleman's
- Procter & Gamble launches Single Tooth Whitestrips in Kentucky
- Preparing for prison life, Martha Stewart makes elegant improvements to prison uniform.