Michael Jackson 92% recyclable
LOS ANGELES – The LA County Coroner released autopsy results this week indicating Michael Jackson’s body is composed of 92% post-consumer goods. Throughout the iconic singer’s life, numerous plastic surgery procedures have replaced 92% of the human tissue with recyclable materials.
The Coroner’s office reportedly returned to the Jackson Family over 100 pounds of plastic, nylon, and silicone to the which was then placed in a curbside recycling bin outside Jackson’s Bel Air residence.
Neighbors reported seeing Joan Rivers sorting through the recyclable components and may have left with a chin implant and a pair of cheek implants.
- Chad Johnson refrains from booty pats during jail term
- Imus not invited to annual CBS Pimps-N-Hos party
- New Kids on the Block postpones reunion tour to accompany daughters at Jonas Brothers concert
- Octomom dating Jon from 'Jon and Kate Plus Eight'
- Obama holds jackass summit with Kanye West and Serena Williams
- George Takei promises to be greatest gay Japanese Oktoberfest Grand Marshall in world history