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Wednesday, June 19th - 11:30 AM-10:00 PM
| Burgermania @ Tavern on the Hill |

DERF Happy Hour
Friday, Jun 28 - 5:30PM-9:30PM
| Mt. Lookout Tavern (MLT's), $10 for 10 Beers -OR- 6 Cocktails! |
Amazon.com ironically not catching on amongst people of the Amazon.
Recent industry studies indicate the popular website Amazon.com has reached high levels of name recognition in virtually every corner of the world with the ironic exception of the Amazon jungle for which the website was named. A closer investigation by researchers at the University of Cincinnati revealed that people of the Amazon have absolutely no awareness of Amazon.com nor are they aware of the existence of the internet, computers, or electricity. A possible reason suggested is the Amazon people may simply not have the time to learn about the internet because they lead such busy lifestyles consisting mostly of hunting, farming, and making medicine out of bits of leaves and mud. In fact a brief survey indicated that given a choice between surfing the internet or engaging in their native custom of painting elaborate designs on their bodies with tree sap, four out of five of Amazon tribe members chose the latter. Of particular concern to executives at Amazon.com, known mostly for its book sales operation, is that the Amazon people do not read books instead preferring to pass on knowledge and folklore by writing little pictures on scraps of cured bark. Amazon.com spokesman Charles Westport commented, "If these people are willing to make more of an effort to embrace technology we are in a position to offer them significant preferred customer discounts and free shipping and handling for a period of time."
Train derailment declared most picturesque spot in Norwood
Escaped circus monkey revealed to be former News 5 Anchor Jack Atherton
Image of toaster appears on Virgin Mary painting
Cincinnati Zoo worker trapped inside Festival of Lights storage facility
STUDY RELEASED: 100% of U.S. new year’s resolutions broken by mid-morning on New Year's Day.
- Men begin faking illness in anticipation of new Twilight movie
- Fireman uses Jaws of Life to trap Mother-in-law in car.
- Derf writers agree only the most maladjusted, immature, and dysfunctional people will enjoy this article
- Man postpones alcohol rehab until end of Party in the Park season.
- Starbucks employee never makes new pot of coffee in break room
- Norwood public pool mostly urine at this point





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