New Pope's Things To Do List
1. Take a nap.
2. Send thank you card to Campaign
3. Visit BMV and get Popemobile
registered to Joe Ratzinger.
4. Place order for official Pope hat.
5. Vow to crush Islam
6. Develop own line of Potpourri
7. Quickly look up definition of the word
8. Fire several Cardinals to establish
9. See about getting Onstar on
10. Consider Mark Burnett's offer for Pope
- 11% of Cincinnati teachers can read.
- Men begin faking illness in anticipation of new Twilight movie
- Woman pretends to be offended by date’s over-willingness to divulge impressive income level
- No Surprise - Report Says Drunks At Teller's Slightly More Polite Than Drunks At Arthur's.
- TriState road work to be confined to holiday weekends and rush hour
- Tragic loss - Billy Graham shot by Cincinnati Police Officer