New Pope's Things To Do List
1. Take a nap.
2. Send thank you card to Campaign
3. Visit BMV and get Popemobile
registered to Joe Ratzinger.
4. Place order for official Pope hat.
5. Vow to crush Islam
6. Develop own line of Potpourri
7. Quickly look up definition of the word
8. Fire several Cardinals to establish
9. See about getting Onstar on
10. Consider Mark Burnett's offer for Pope
- Tragic mixup - Area woman asks for Botox but receives buttocks
- Woman Dumps Boyfriend via Powerpoint Presentation
- STUDY RELEASED: 100% of U.S. new year’s resolutions broken by mid-morning on New Year's Day.
- DERF TRIVIA: What time did the clock stop at the corner of Edwards and Madison?
- Tragic loss - Billy Graham shot by Cincinnati Police Officer
- Oakley man marries Golden Tee video game.