Detroit looters inconvenienced by power outage.
Detroit - The infamous Northeast power outage which lasted for several days this month presented a significant obstacle for many Detroit looters who have traditionally enjoyed the safety and security of looting all year in broad daylight. "We don’t need a power outage to do our job. This was a setback for us." complained looting enthusiast Scott Marshall. Many looters who have the discipline and motivation to loot all year have complained about the difficult and unsafe work conditions created by this power outage. Lawyers representing many Detroit looters blame the power companies for creating this threat to the livelihood of their clients.
- Drunk residents of Brookstone apartments report Virgin Mary apparition in that electrical thing across the street.
- Introducing the award-winning Derf Happy Hour Doorman, Scooter Wellington
- Man proud to be the guy who hands you a paper towel in the nightclub bathroom so you don't have to go to all the trouble of getting one from the dispenser yourself.
- OTR to develop new ‘Epic Beard District’
- Man postpones alcohol rehab until end of Party in the Park season.
- Cincinnati Zoo worker found trapped inside Festival of Lights storage facility