Mallory Prefers Mitchell’s Over Phyllis
CINCINNATI - For his facials, Swedish massages, mani/pedis, and bikini waxes, aroma therapy, and capuccino with mocha drizzle, Mayor Mark Mallory has declared a winner in the most fabulous beauty salon in the tri-state: It’s Mitchells over Phyllis. DERF went on location to ask some of the staff about Mallory’s regular visits. Gregory, a strapping young Mitchell’s masseur, reported that the mayor specifically requests his services once, sometimes twice every week. And contrary to the rumors about African Americans being stingy with the tips, Gregory insists that our fair mayor is “more than generous” with his post-massage gratuity. So next time you're at Mitchell's and you detect a delicate balsamic floral fragrance with subtle musky undertones the Mayor may be in the room next door!
- Joe Biden suspected of sending nude texts of self to Michelle Bachmann
- Hurricane Irene violently disrupts Steve Chabot's hair during town hall meeting
- Cheney’s old heart buried in secret, secure location
- Cincinnati seeks transportation funds for OTR piggyback rides
- After Firemen and Coal Miners, CNN rolls out plans to upgrade more occupations to hero status
- 2008 Earth Day marketing required record level of natural resources.