John Kerry's family tree offers reason for long face.
Recently discovered public records of John Kerry's family history help unravel the mystery of the candidate's incredible facial length. The family tree shows John Kerry's mother was Mr. Ed, the loveable and long-faced 70's TV character. Responding to public interest in this personal fact, Kerry said, "You may have known her as Mr. Ed but I knew her as Mommy. She was indeed a wonderful Mother who blessed me with much more than just a very long face."
- Report: Dwight Eisenhower exaggerated about serving in WWII
- Congress working nights collating Obamacare applications until website functional
- T.J. Houshmandzadeh miraculously maintains straight face while saying 'decision to leave was difficult'
- John Dowd alleges Pete Rose was actual Nicole Simpson killer
- Air Force One pictures turn out really nice
- Mallory Prefers Mitchellís Over Phyllis