our breathtaking newsletter

Weekly gloriousness sent to your inbox.

Drop your email address here»

Featured Local Event full calendar»

Friday, February 10th - 5:00 PM-11:00 PM

$4 Sake Bomb Friday @ Teak Thai Cuisine

DERF Happy Hour

Keep checking back here to find out where the next DERF Happy Hour will be!

sports News Archive

» View Current sports Stories

In alternate universe Steeler fans celebrate win over Bengals with quiet dignity
Four generations of Nittany Lion mascots allegedly molested
Mike Brown organizes Occupy Paul Brown Stadium initiative
Carson Palmer disgusted with direction of Raiders, demands trade
Oakland area hotdogs fearful of Carson Palmer’s arrival
Jerome Simpson devours pizza and chicken wings on sideline
Jerome Simpson claims NASA satellite carrying pot landed in front yard
1972 Dolphins relieved by Bengals loss
Undefeated Bengals demand immediate possession of Super Bowl Rings
Carson Palmer regrets Andy Dalton fantasy draft pick
That one quarterback replaces that other quarterback as Bengals win
FOX19 Balanced News introduces new segment, Bengals 2011-12: The Super Bowl Season
Fantasy football league agrees to end lockout from mother’s basement
Roethlisberger wedding reception held in hall without restrooms
Cincinnati WalMart declines PacMan Jones greeter application
Next Nascar event to be held in downtown Cincinnati during Octoberfest
A-Rod spotted romantically with each cast member of TV show Queen City
Cleveland plans parade for victorious Dallas Mavericks
Ann Arbor sweater vest industry recovers after decade long slump
Jim Tressel retires to spend more time with family of sweater vests
Mike Leake unable to locate Mother’s Day gift receipt
Kentucky Derby festival kicks off with ceremonial first “Infield Urination”
Cincinnati Reds' Mike Leake named honorary Bengal
Cam Newton threatens to retire if drafted by Bengals
Billy Packer spends NCAA tournament alone in room, mumbling about Duke
Bronson Arroyo contracts mono after making out with self
Reds pitching staff detained by Arizona immigration police
Jim Tressel sells sweater vest collection to pay NCAA fine
Millions protest in U.S. streets over treatment of NFL players
Carson Palmer collecting boxes behind grocery stores
Disney princesses relieved Ben Roethlisberger won't be visiting
Super Bowl pregame show still underway
Bob Bratkowski offers to fix Paul Brown stadium for $42 million
Winter X Games host totally stoked
John Boehner to coach weeping Jay Cutler in off season
Jordan Palmer threatens to retire if Carson is not traded
Cincinnati fans help Ochocinco pack bags for New England
Cancer patients tired of Carson Palmer hanging around hospital
Peyton Manning to decide fate of Indianapolis Colts coaching staff
Bengal fans encourage NFL owner lockout
Marvin Lewis admits suffering from masochist tendencies
Carson Palmer inducted into Steelers Hall of Fame
Bob Huggins recruits violent Bearcat mascot to play at West Virginia
Bengals set record for number of appearances in other teams' highlight films
Bengals innovate new exciting ways to embarrass city on national stage
Randy Moss tells Titans he'll only catch passes from self
Randy Moss demanded release from Vikings after inappropriate advances from Brett Favre
Bengals offensive plays called by same antique computer that creates WEBN playlist
T.O and Chad Ochocinco study reality film during bye week
Jay Bruce's Golden Glove found in dumpster behind stadium
Local hospitals report sharp rise in Reds bandwagon related injuries
Snap, Crackle, and Pop admit to running phone sex operation
Wii tennis match between Cooper Manning and sister Olivia draws little media interest
Ben Roethlisberger and brother compete in Sexual Assault Bowl
Bengal Disappointment: Chad and T.O almost miss halftime meeting with reality show agent
Indianapolis Colts plan on resting Peyton Manning until playoffs
NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell tweets about Ochocinco’s tweeting fine
Roger Clemens claims he sold steroids to members of Congress
Maria Sharapova blamed for Cincinnati heat wave
T.O. REPORT: Terrell Owens’ Top 10 Preseason Complaints
Miami Heat reluctantly agree to play out season before getting championship trophy
Entire Colombian soccer team made of cocaine
King James decides to split self into six equal parts
World Cup Soccer upstaged by countdown to World Equestrian Games
CDC REPORT: Americans have natural immunity to World Cup soccer fever
Newport strip clubs plan welcome party for PacMan Jones
Cooper Manning passed over again in NFL draft
Ben Roethlisberger considers off season restroom attendant job
Bob Huggins comforts Tiger Woods on 18th green at Augusta
Michael Phelps lining up summer life guarding gigs
Low quality copy of NCAA brackets create office pool havoc
Damaged fire hydrant acknowledged during Tiger Woods’ apology
Bob Costas sets example for faking interest in Winter Olympics
Canadian Olympic gold medalist, Alexandre Bilodeau, already not a household name again
Manning-tron 3000 processor encounters critical failure during Super Bowl
STUDY: Tom Brady 47% less attractive after season ending playoff loss
Peyton Manning hopes Super Bowl appearance leads to endorsements
Teammates don’t respond to Shayne Graham’s Super Bowl party eVite
Bengals enjoy relaxing on-the-field bye week in New Jersey
Team you’ve never heard of beats other team you've never heard of in 2010 IrrelevantBowl.com
Tim Tebow vows to cure Urban Meyer
Tabloid discovers woman who did not have affair with Tiger Woods
Elin Woods new spokesperson for Jaws of Life
Bengals travel back in time during fourth quarter of Raiders game
City of Pittsburgh curls up in ball, cries like baby
Marvin Lewis takes Bengals out for ice cream after win
Chad Ochocinco hoped to read own book during bye week
Bengal fans hoping more Bengals players will buy them tickets
CC Sabathia tired of being copied on everyone’s emails
Chicago Bears consider shutting down franchise after humiliating loss
Tony Romo trades self for Carson Palmer in fantasy football
Discarded ‘Terrible Towels’ clean up Ohio River
Tim Tebow scolds concussion into turning life around and doing more volunteer work
Bengals plans to lose in final minutes thwarted
Bengals to patent new techniques for losing
Michael Vick to mentor Rick Pitino
Lance Armstrong returns home, dominates local YWCA spinning class
Pete Rose declared eligible for Hair Dye Hall of Fame
LIVESTRONG wristbands discovered to contain carcinogens
Joey Votto accepts air traffic controller position
Bengals show restraint: Pass on Charles Manson in 6th round of NFL draft
Ken Griffey Jr. heads back to Seattle, knees and hamstrings in carry-on bag
In alternate universe Steeler fans celebrate Superbowl victory with quiet dignity
Popularity of new Speedo Bong credited to Michael Phelps
Bengals Hire Detroit Lions General Manager
Bengals mathematically eliminated from 2010, 2011, 2012 playoffs
O.J. Simpson's search for real killer confined to smaller area
Plaxico Burress graduates from Chris Henry University
Gucci Who Dey bags popular this fall season
Tiger Woods bails out General Motors
Parade honors Bengals glorious tie
Mike Brown points out Bengals undefeated in second half of season
Bengals season ticket holders seek government bailout
Woman, 89, provides ball security training for Bengals
Backup QB Fitzpatrick unavailable for next Bengals game due to National Honor Society meeting
Dallas strip club industry concerned about possible loss of Pacman Jones
Bengals defensive holes seen from Google Earth
Bengals leave stadium in fourth quarter to avoid traffic
Tri-State wind storm triggered by massive sucking force at Paul Brown Stadium
USC to replace Bengals in AFC North
Chris Henry changes name to Chad Johnson
Embarrassing typo spoils Olympic Heroes celebration
Bengals release bengal tiger plus three players
Chinese Olympic gymnasts return heroically to playpens throughout China
Chinese Olympic gymnasts return triumphantly to playpens throughout China
Super athlete Michael Phelps perfects one-handed iron cross on gymnastic rings
Green Bay Packers' Aaron Rodgers undergoes facial reconstruction surgery
Green Bay Packers offer Brett Favre unconditional reverse deactivation restriction precluded with a Series B non-retirement binding discharge waiver (Helsinki version, 1972)
BODIES Exhibit cadaver discovered to be Marty Brennaman
Robbie Knievel injured on teacup ride after setting jump record
New Canseco book implicates baseball mascots in steroid scandal
Brett Favre schedules new series of press conferences to reconfirm retirement plans.
Giselle Bundchen dating Tom Petty
Bob Huggins ups his pimp game.
MLB's Mitchell Report urges Reds to use steroids
“If I Stole My Memorabilia, This Is How I Would Do It”
Inside the Numbers
2007 Bengals Rookie Class Reported 60% Tougher to Pronounce
The Evolution of a Cheater
Barry Bonds inducted into Steroid Hall of Fame
Undercover officer praised in Michael Vick arrest
Ron Mexico indicted in Chihuahua scandal
Reds: Hire Bill Brasky as New Manager
Drugs in Sports: All in Favor?
Carson. Say It Ain’t So.
Time for Reds, Coutlangus to Get Freaky on Pujols
Bengals acquire defense attorney Stan Chesley in first round of NFL draft
The Bengals Draft, My Way
Aging Greg Oden drafted, announces retirement
Mayor-sized home plate installed in ballpark
Chris Henry offers to mentor Josh Hamilton
NCAA TOURNAMENT UPDATE
by Sarah Leugers, DERF Sports Columnist
Tim Hardaway cast in Brokeback Mountain sequel
Griffey severs left hand opening Spaghetti-O’s
After the NFL: Men Find New, Creative Ways to Ignore Wives
Tony Kornheiser dupes Joe Theisman on air.
Chris Sabo's face seen in pumpkin pie
Odell Thurman removed from sideline after snorting it.
George Foreman to appear in first ever pay-per-view infomercial.
Rash of burglaries during La Salle-Elder football game - homes vulnerable across entire west side.
Terrell Owens' publicist hires own publicist.
CourtTV signs agreement to cover entire Bengals 06/07 season.
Tiger denies charges of mauling handler.
Nation caught in grip of looming WNBA strike.
Kobe Bryant expected to go high in the Convict Basketball League draft.
Bengals' talent scout reiterates focus on quality.
Outraged NASCAR Fans Discover Jeff Gordon Only Pretending to Be a Hillbilly
University of Cincinnati Basketball Coach Bob Huggins strikes recruiting agreement with Ohio's prison system.
Norwood Man Regrets Betting on WWF Wrestling Events
Jim Bowden overheard comparing other mundane annoyances to tragic world events
Fans already speculating on Michael Jordan's possible return from latest retirement.
Oakley Man Wants Equal Rights for Dog Fighting Fans
Ted Williams’ children agree to build life size bobble head figure with father’s corpse.

Recent Headlines

Local man diehard Super Bowl fan
Wheels added to Joe Paterno statue for coaching and recruiting visits
BCS celebrates another year of perfect, non-controversial college football rankings
Bill Belichick admits hiding video cameras inside Tim Tebow's church
Carson Palmer proud of role in leading Bengals to playoffs

About
Advertise
Press
Derfimonials
FAQ
Submit Ideas
Contact