Janet Jackson’s breasts mourn privately during memorial service
LOS ANGELES - In a humble tribute to the deceased King of Pop, Janet Jackson’s breasts did not make an appearance. Ms. Jackson’s breasts remained unexposed throughout the entire Michael Jackson memorial service.
Since their surprise appearance at the 2004 Super Bowl, Ms. Jackson’s breasts have led a reclusive life protected by several layers of reinforced clothing.
As an added measure of security during the memorial service, the Jackson family security team ensured Justin Timberlake maintained a safe distance from Janet during her performance.
Janet’s breasts issued a statement thanking everyone for their support during this difficult time. They will be spending the next few weeks grieving with LaToya and Tito’s breasts.
- Instagram invests in photo modernization software
- Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck hoping to fill publicity void.
- Gamblers have Shadow Hare at 3-1 odds as mystery witness in Widmer trial
- Queen City TV ratings surpassed by UDF security video of rotating hot dog machine
- Jessica Simpson's baby born during eighteenth trimester of pregnancy
- Autopsy Report: Amy Winehouse died in 2004