New Pope's Things To Do List
1. Take a nap.
2. Send thank you card to Campaign
3. Visit BMV and get Popemobile
registered to Joe Ratzinger.
4. Place order for official Pope hat.
5. Vow to crush Islam
6. Develop own line of Potpourri
7. Quickly look up definition of the word
8. Fire several Cardinals to establish
9. See about getting Onstar on
10. Consider Mark Burnett's offer for Pope
- Local high school dropouts planning 10 year reunion of dropping out.
- COMMUNITY: Volunteers build meth lab wheel chair ramp
- Northern Kentucky removes shirt for rest of summer
- 11% of Cincinnati teachers can read.
- Gay couples prepare for marital equality: Life sentence of dispassionate boredom
- Man postpones alcohol rehab until end of Party in the Park season.