New Pope's Things To Do List
1. Take a nap.
2. Send thank you card to Campaign
3. Visit BMV and get Popemobile
registered to Joe Ratzinger.
4. Place order for official Pope hat.
5. Vow to crush Islam
6. Develop own line of Potpourri
7. Quickly look up definition of the word
8. Fire several Cardinals to establish
9. See about getting Onstar on
10. Consider Mark Burnett's offer for Pope
- Northside S.W.A.T. standoff ends in fabulous S.W.A.T. dance off
- DERF TRIVIA: What time did the clock stop at the corner of Edwards and Madison?
- Northern Kentucky removes shirt for rest of summer
- Area woman announces plans for all that junk, all that junk inside her trunk.
- UPLIFTING COMMUNITY MOMENT: Back of the house employees allowed to meet front of the house employees at upscale restaurant
- Amazon.com ironically not catching on amongst people of the Amazon.