New Pope's Things To Do List
1. Take a nap.
2. Send thank you card to Campaign
3. Visit BMV and get Popemobile
registered to Joe Ratzinger.
4. Place order for official Pope hat.
5. Vow to crush Islam
6. Develop own line of Potpourri
7. Quickly look up definition of the word
8. Fire several Cardinals to establish
9. See about getting Onstar on
10. Consider Mark Burnett's offer for Pope
- Norwood public pool mostly urine at this point
- Introducing the award-winning Derf Happy Hour Doorman, Scooter Wellington
- Scientists successfully breed first wheel-dog
- Colony devastated in ant farm landslide.
- Ohio's oldest alter boy, age 57, regrets seducing 22 year-old Priest
- Couple hires Personal Shoplifter