New Pope's Things To Do List
1. Take a nap.
2. Send thank you card to Campaign
3. Visit BMV and get Popemobile
registered to Joe Ratzinger.
4. Place order for official Pope hat.
5. Vow to crush Islam
6. Develop own line of Potpourri
7. Quickly look up definition of the word
8. Fire several Cardinals to establish
9. See about getting Onstar on
10. Consider Mark Burnett's offer for Pope
- Gay man admits to being a Congressman
- STUDY RELEASED: 100% of U.S. new year’s resolutions broken by mid-morning on New Year's Day.
- Corpse found wrapped in KEEP AMERICA BEAUTIFUL banner
- America’s Migrant workers embrace 'Leave Your Child at Home Day'.
- Oakley man marries Golden Tee video game.
- Woman pretends to be offended by date’s over-willingness to divulge impressive income level