our breathtaking newsletter

Weekly gloriousness sent to your inbox.

Drop your email address here»

Featured Local Event         full calendar»

Wednesday, September 3rd - 11:30 AM-11:00 PM

Burger night! @ Mt. Lookout Tavern (MLT's)

DERF Happy Hour

Friday, Sep 12 - 5:30PM-9:00PM

Mt. Lookout Tavern (MLT's), $10 for 10 Beers -OR- 7 Cocktails!
lifestyle News
  • Comments
  • lifestyle home
  • Related Stories
  • Email To Friend

God Appeared at Crossroads Community Church hoping it was still a hardware store.

In search of plywood and floor tile, God walked into the newly opened Crossroads Community Church last Sunday. Thrilled parishioners flocked around the Lord hoping to bask in His warm glow. But after learning that the former HomeQuarters Hardware store had been converted to a church, God appeared disappointed and asked, "I'm in a bit of a hurry. Can anyone give me directions to the Home Depot?" Realizing the Lord's appearance was a mistake, dejected parishioners sobbed openly but managed to offer the Holy one directions. Crossroads Parishioner, Walter Billings, stated that it is not the first time a do-it-yourself home remodeler confused Crossroads for the HomeQuarters store. "We actually considered keeping the HQ sign and calling our church Holy Quarters." said Billings who also moonlights in the paint department at Home Depot.