DerfMagazine proven to cause more adult-bedwetting and high-pressure vomiting than other websites.
DerfMagazine employees celebrated this week when the Food and Drug Administration released it's study regarding DerfMagazine's long-term devastating effect on the human urology and gastrointestinal systems. "We are off to a great start." said Derf CEO, Trevor Billingsworth. "From here, things can only get better...neurological disorders, macular degeneration, skin deterioration. I can't wait!" The FDA also stated Popeye's Chicken on the corner of Madison and Edwards is the only business known to pose a greater threat to human health.
- Toenail fungus commercial soon to be cute children's cartoon.
- Study indicates car accidents leading cause of dropped cell phone calls
- Clay Aiken's music turns iPod gay
- Alarming number of Cincinnatians find breathing easier during smog alerts.
- A cable channel that only airs episodes of Walker Texas Ranger would probably be really popular
- Family fed up with Dad's habit of recapping bathroom events