DerfMagazine proven to cause more adult-bedwetting and high-pressure vomiting than other websites.
DerfMagazine employees celebrated this week when the Food and Drug Administration released it's study regarding DerfMagazine's long-term devastating effect on the human urology and gastrointestinal systems. "We are off to a great start." said Derf CEO, Trevor Billingsworth. "From here, things can only get better...neurological disorders, macular degeneration, skin deterioration. I can't wait!" The FDA also stated Popeye's Chicken on the corner of Madison and Edwards is the only business known to pose a greater threat to human health.
- Northside S.W.A.T. standoff ends in fabulous S.W.A.T. dance off
- STUDY: Majority of high school students stoned during candlelight vigils
- Ribbon conservation leading concern among Americans
- STUDY RELEASED: 100% of U.S. new year’s resolutions broken by mid-morning on New Year's Day.
- Cincinnati public schools report math scores lower by like around 10% which is more or less about the same as around 10 out of every 100 or so.
- Local man sets record low in charity date auction