Irish Americans argue DUI laws culturally biased
WASHINGTON D.C. - Following St. Patrick's Day, Irish people across America are using the unofficial holiday as a means to publicly convince lawmakers to reduce the severity of the harsh DUI laws in the U.S. For decades the majority of Irish Americans have expressed concern the DUI laws represent an unfair cultural bias against Irish tradition.
During a press announcement in Washington, Irish lobbyist Michael Callahan said, "Being drunk is the way of our people. Drinking is the most important part of my life and it was for my father and his father before him. This cultural legal bias against the Irish is one of America’s darkest secrets. We are being forced to give up our rich tradition of drunkenness."
Many Irish Americans feel each new DUI law introduced in the U.S. is a slap in the face of Irish tradition and creates additional suffering throughout the Irish community. Scholars of Irish history at Boston College released data this week indicating the modern DUI laws have created a level of cultural anguish comparable to that caused by the great Irish potato famine of 1845 in which over one million people died of starvation.
Throughout Washington D.C. this week Irish protesters chanted, “This is our holocaust!” Lobbyist Callahan further commented, “We understand to outsiders our drunkenness, bar brawling, and other disorderly behavior appear chaotic, however they are all vital elements that help weave our delicate and complex social fabric.”
- Local man posts slightly too often on mobile mammography Facebook wall
- Area hipster loses track of which clothing items are ironic
- Ludlow KY gears up for summer tourist
- Cincinnati public schools report math scores lower by like around 10% which is more or less about the same as around 10 out of every 100 or so.
- Son diligently prepares to take over family Sno Castle empire
- DerfMagazine proven to cause more adult-bedwetting and high-pressure vomiting than other websites.