COLUMBUS, OH - Following the departure of Cincinnati based Chiquita to North Carolina, Ohio Governor John Kasich has proclaimed that bananas are no longer welcome in state approved fruit salads.

“Let the word go forth from this time and place,” declared Kasich. “That the great state of Ohio is taking action. That we are focused on jobs and the future. And that bananas tend to brown and spoil fruit salad anyway.”

The new rule will go into effect immediately. Moments after Chiquita announced the decision to move to North Carolina,…

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