City Council members injured during severe brainstorm
CINCINNATI - Several members of Cincinnati's City Council remain in critical condition this week after a brainstorming session that caused severe injuries. Unaccustomed to the level of intellectual activity accompanied by brainstorming, council members were not prepared for the consequences. Witnesses in attendance say the council members appeared helpless and devastated by the unanticipated flurry of open discussion and new ideas. From his bed in Good Samaritan Hospital John Cranley commented, “This is the kind of activity you have to build up to. Jumping right into a brainstorm obviously placed us all at risk. This was brutal.” Most council members have begun a Doctor supervised rehabilitation program that exposes each council member to short periods of light intellectual activity. Continued and prolonged exposure to intellectual activity will come later as each council member learns to tolerate the increased thought level. Jim Tarbell has been released from the hospital and is recuperating at home and says he hopes to return to work after a few months of rehabilitation.
- Over The Rhine placed under house arrest
- John Edwards teaches inmates how to take handsome mug shots
- Katy Perry’s skintight dress inspires Bill Clinton to run for office again
- Mallory Prefers Mitchell’s Over Phyllis
- Bin Laden: “What a pleasant surprise that most of my 72 virgins look exactly like Michelle Obama.”
- Local soldier only pretending to miss home.