John Kerry's family tree offers reason for long face.
Recently discovered public records of John Kerry's family history help unravel the mystery of the candidate's incredible facial length. The family tree shows John Kerry's mother was Mr. Ed, the loveable and long-faced 70's TV character. Responding to public interest in this personal fact, Kerry said, "You may have known her as Mr. Ed but I knew her as Mommy. She was indeed a wonderful Mother who blessed me with much more than just a very long face."
- Capital of Zimbabwe unaware it had sister city
- Congress announces terrorist I.D. card program
- Celebrity NASCAR Driver Dick Trickle Backs Leslie Ghiz’s Proposal To Ban Nicknames
- Bin Laden: “What a pleasant surprise that most of my 72 virgins look exactly like Michelle Obama.”
- Shadow Hare Allegiance of Super Heroes denies Simon Leis membership application
- Mayor Cranley announces appearance on Undercover Boss