“If I Stole My Memorabilia, This Is How I Would Do It”
OJ has become more American Psycho than imaginable. The creepy grinning mug shot, the affable way he ambles to the police cruiser, and his flippant comment to the press: “I’m OJ Simpson. How am I going to think that I’m going to rob somebody and get away with it? I thought what happened in Vegas stays in Vegas.” Sounds like OJ has watched Ocean’s Eleven a few too many times. Or is he trying some sort of Jedi mind trick on all of us? Surely OJ Simpson wouldn’t be dumb enough to show his own face in an armed robbery of his own memorabilia. Right? It’s absurd. It’s too obvious. It’s like… killing your own wife and getting away with it.
If OJ gets off on this one, I’m moving to Canada.
- Aroldis Chapman flees to Cuba to avoid US traffic court
- Replacement NFL refs find new jobs with Time Warner customer service
- Dead Sea Scrolls exhibit expected to draw larger crowds than Carson Palmer
- Bengals show restraint: Pass on Charles Manson in 6th round of NFL draft
- Entire Colombian soccer team made of cocaine
- Several Steelers locker room attendants injured from dirty hits during victory celebration