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Sunday, September 12th - 9:00 PM-2:00 AM
| Industry Night @ Righteous Room @ Righteous Room |

DERF Happy Hour
Friday, Sep 17 - 5:30PM-9:30PM
| Mount Adams Pavilion, $10 for 10 Beers -OR- 6 Cocktails! |
Outraged NASCAR Fans Discover Jeff Gordon Only Pretending to Be a Hillbilly
In an unusual interview with Racing Weekly, Harvard graduate Jeff Gordon with a hillbilly accent for over two minutes. The confused reporter pressed the issue and Gordon finally dropped a bombshell saying, "Ok, I’m not really a hillbilly. I was born and raised in Maryland. You can’t get any less hillbilly than that." After graduating from business school, Gordon decided to pursue a career in NASCAR and knew he could realize more lucrative returns by mimicking his hillbilly NASCAR fan base. "I did whatever it took from carrying Kodiak chew in my pocket to watching fishing shows on TV." Even though most of his fans are mildly retarded, Gordon stated he still regrets misleading them.
- Bengals mathematically eliminated from 2010, 2011, 2012 playoffs
- Tiger Woods bails out General Motors
- Manning-tron 3000 processor encounters critical failure during Super Bowl
- Marvin Lewis takes Bengals out for ice cream after win
- Terrell Owens' publicist hires own publicist.
- Bengals show restraint: Pass on Charles Manson in 6th round of NFL draft





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