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News In Brief
Illegal immigrants hired to cater Congressional Immigration Reform conference
Carnival Cruise Lines opens booking for Aimless Crapfest Cruise 2013
Area fan begins drinking for Reds Opening Day this week
Michael Vick gives high praise of new Westminster Dog Show app
After cancellation of reality show, Pete Rose seeks new ways to embarrass self
Obama declines DIck Cheney’s offer to go skeet shooting
Egyptian protestors further enraged after watching ridiculous ProBowl
Harbaugh brothers decline services from Tom Brady's Super Bowl hair and makeup team
Jessica Simpson has now been pregnant for 130 straight trimesters
Jodie Foster Golden Globe speech expected to end in late July
Oprah inspired by Lance Armstrong to admit she drinks regular Coke.
Sports in Decline: Study indicates 50% of sports teams lose each week

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